February 2012
6 posts
Just to clarify, I have no delusions that that...
hey i'm online for a hot minute
sup sluts?
January 2012
25 posts
1 tag
My Favorite Albums of 2011 - #1
#1. Beyoncé – 4
Because it was so much more fun than all the adult-pop Adele sold truckloads of, while being more mature (and, okay, heteronormative) than the thumping phoney-house that plagued radio all year, 4 seemed too detached from the zeitgeist for casual pop fans and thus became the mythic Child of Destiny’s first commercial flop. And it’s such a damn shame because...
i don't think you guys are ready for this i'm...
1 tag
My Favorite Albums of 2011 - #2
#2. Danny Brown – XXX
I could say a bunch of stuff about how Brown, an MC from Detroit who’s missing some very important teeth and wears a swooshy emo-kid hairstyle that would have been a bit much even in 2005, represented the modern man more accurately than anyone else in 2011 by illustrating the futility of adulthood with the year’s most surprising flights of lyrical fancy. But...
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My Favorite Albums of 2011 - #3
#3. Patton Oswalt – Finest Hour
The comedian who was “programmed to hate” records his kindest album ever before a huge and adoring crowd in Seattle. Though he still has plenty of venom to spew at New York filth, “hipster douchebags,” romantic comedies and homophobes, he proves himself to be just as funny finding nice things to say about everything from sweatpants to Disneyland. Riding such...
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My Favorite Albums of 2011 - #4
#4. Tom Waits – Bad as Me
Any buzz you may have heard about Waits’ gazillionth album being a disappointment is bad and wrong and stupid. It’s a lightweight record of brief, crispy songs, but after four straight platters of doomy dirges and political pondering, dude needed to get a little crispier. Bad as Me is as likeable and fun a hunk of pop music as anything Britney or Beyoncé...
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My Favorite Albums of 2011 - #5
#5. Tyler the Creator – Goblin
This is a touchy subject, the touchiest of 2011 probably, so I’ll try to keep this short: GLAAD and Tegan Quinn and the government of New Zealand and a million complainers on Tumblr gave this young spaz hell all year for his choice of words, but if they don’t see the bracingly obvious signs that he’s just satirizing the last 20 years of phoney...
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My Favorite Albums of 2011 - #6
#6. Tonetta – 777, volumes 1, 2 and 3
It’s a story as old as music itself: A paunchy, fifty-something Canadian guy (who sings like a gravelly John Lyndon for some reason) records a seemingly infinite number of extremely lo-fi, nightmarish and surprisingly tuneful folk-pop and drum-machine-assisted glam songs about giving blowjobs, eating feces and fornicating with 90-year-old women....
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My Favorite Albums of 2011 - #7
#7. Hunx and His Punx – Too Young to Be in Love
I found no better drinking soundtrack in 2011 than this album of Motown tropes re-purposed by a nasally queen who can’t sing to save his life, backed by a garage band so loose they sound like they’ve never met before (including Shannon Shaw of Shannon and the Clams, whose backing vocals absolutely kill on “The Curse of Being Young”...
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My FaVoRiTe AlBuMs Of 2011 - #8
#8. tUnE-yArDs – W H O K I L L
My biggest musical dilemma of the year was in determining whether or not this album’s thrift-store agit-funk is amazing or obnoxious. If you can figure it out, please tell me while I shake my ass to “Gangsta” with a confused look on my face for the hundredth time.
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My Favorite Albums of 2011 - #9
#9. Wolves in the Throne Room – Celestial Lineage
Every metal kid who’s in the know has told me that these blissful pagan-folk dirges by a trio of Olympia farm-hippies constitute the pussiest black metal album ever made. No surprise, then, that it’s the only one I’ve ever wanted to listen to more than once. Get it for your mom. It’s almost as soothing as Sade.
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My Favorite Albums of 2011 - #10
#10. Soulja Boy – Smooky
What do you do when your dedication to being an obnoxious fad has degraded you to commercial ruin? If you’re the notoriously terrible and uncreative Soulja Boy, apparently you strike back by inventively deconstructing everything that makes you awful. On this incredibly unsettling mixtape, the young has-been reduces himself and then everything else to being...
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My Favorite Albums of 2011 - #11
#11. The Dirtbombs - Party Store
The disintegration of The White Stripes broke my heart, but maybe it signaled an end to the inbred racism of the Detroit garage scene. The Dirtbombs used rock to kill rockism by covering seminal Detroit techno hits with sloppy perfectionism. Every cut, especially the crazily maligned 20-minute “Bug in the Bass Bin”, rules hard and rocks good,...
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My Favorite Albums of 2011 - #12
#12. Nick Lowe – The Old Magic
Nick Lowe’s evolution from post-punk meanie to salty old crooner has resulted in some of the sultriest and most unexpectedly sexy records of his or anyone’s career, and this album does nothing to yield that progress. On the opener “Stoplight Roses,” my favorite ballad of the year, the man uses his wizened voice and hangdog wit to carve out an...
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My Favorite Albums of 2011 - #13
#13. Shannon and the Clams – Sleep Talk
Jacked girl-group drums. Muddy garage guitars. A fat sex-goddess who moans like she’s coughing up blood. There is almost nothing special about this album, and that is what makes it excellent.
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My Favorite Albums of 2011 - #14
#14. Kendrick Lamar – Section.80
Don’t you kinda wish at least one of these sad-sack rappers everyone’s frothing about could actually, you know, rap? And wouldn’t it be great if this mythical great rapper was legitimately introspective instead of merely self-pitying like a certain Canadian child-actor\Rick Ross bromancee we’ve all been reading crappy thinkpieces...
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My Favorite Albums of 2011 - #15
#15. Lil B – I’m Gay
Even if Tyler the Creator had been caught raping somebody on camera, Lil B still would have been 2011’s most polarizing rapper: A guy who aimlessly freestyles about almost nothing, with little or no regard for the beat he’s on. A guy who posts videos of his cat to YouTube and clogs up everyone’s Twitter feeds with pointless retweets from white...
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My Favorite Albums of 2011 - #16
#16. Stephen Malkmus and the Jicks – Mirror Traffic
Indie rock songwriting just isn’t fun anymore. Can you write vague lyrics and smother them in reverb until everything sounds like a pleasant din? Congratulations, you are Bon Iver and the Arcade Fire and everyone else. But back in the suddenly-desirable wild-berry-Pop-Tart 90’s, there was a place for people who enjoyed having a...
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My Favorite Albums of 2011 - #17
#17. Jay-Z and Kanye West – Watch the Throne
I wouldn’t call this album a disappointment, since I’m no Jay-Z fan, but it was undeniably disheartening to see two “titans” spend so much money on something that seemed completely disconnected from the present (the whole Roc-A-Wear / Occupy Wall Street t-shirt debacle illustrated this problem even better). However, it does have the...
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My Favorite Albums of 2011 - #18
#18. Middle Brother - Middle Brother
Three guys from alt-country bands I have never, ever listened to got together and made the genre’s least embarrassing album in years. And they wrote one of the most undebatably perfect lyrics of this or any year: “I know my days are numbered but I’m bad at math / I got a dick so hard that a cat couldn’t scratch.” Bet Danny Brown wishes...
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My Favorite Albums of 2011 - #19
#19. Tim Hecker – Ravedeath, 1972
This year I tried to appreciate a bunch of things I had previously dismissed as pointless: I learned superhero origin stories, watched football games, read every blog about Fashion Week I could find, and listened to loads of ambient albums, almost none of them as good as this one. I still don’t understand how Hecker gets an emotional response out of me...
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My Favorite Albums of 2011 - #20
#20. P.J. Harvey – Let England Shake
Even though there was massive political upheaval all over the place, 2011 lacked a really good polemic record full of potential hashtag quotes. So instead we had Let England Shake, a wartime record that will never, sadly, sound irrelevant even if its ramshackle horror-folk rage seemed squarely aimed at Bush-era problems. Just a tad late, Polly, but an...
Okay, Tumblr fucked up that last post so you have...
I’m not putting any more time into this than I have to
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My Favorite Songs of 2011
Azealia Banks feat. Lazy Jay - “212”
Nick Lowe - “Stoplight Roses”
Tonetta - “Pressure Zone”
Beyonce - “Party” and “Countdown”
Danny Brown - “Monopoly”
Middle Brother - “Middle Brother”
Tyler the Creator - “Yonkers”
Lady Gaga - “The Edge of Glory”
Spank Rock - “Energy”
Kendrick Lamar - “A.D.H.D.”
Britney Spears – “Dance Until the World Ends”
David...
HEY EVERYONE
Back on here for a hot minute to post my way late and totally lame FAVORITE MUSIC OF 2011 lists.
HERE IT GOES
November 2011
1 post
Oh my god guys
TUMBLR IS WORKING PROPERLY
October 2011
16 posts
everybody follow me on twitter
My twitter game is so tight.
Twitter.com/aenglandjr
“When I pop my cock and make ya drop to da beat”
– Trina (via femalerappers)
Gonna reblog so many big, thick dames now
Try and stop me
nerdpoet asked: hey you followed me a while back and i don't think we ever spoke... wassup?
Getting back on Tumblr has immediately made me...
Time to polish off an 8 ball and listen to The xx.
anti-trust:
I just looked at myself shirtless in the mirror and I guess I’m going as either Teen Wolf or George Costanza this Halloween
My thoughts on music from the last five months
The new Tom Waits album is, uh, good.
Well one thing I notice in my return to Tumblr is that every girl is still posting the same shitty gifs.
So there’s that.
thickblackberry asked: Guess who got a tumblr?!
Hey anyone still following me?
I’m making my return.
What have you been up to these last few months?
I’ve been dumped by my girlfriend and rotting in depression, and now I’m in the cast of a children’s bluegrass musical.
So kind of a lot’s happened to me.
July 2011
1 post
HIYA FOLKS
I’m back, even though Tumblr is still acting ridiculous!
How is everyone?
Did I miss any good porn?
Has anyone said “Super 8, more like Pooper 8” yet?
I love you guys. keep me in your thoughs as I suffer without internet alone!
June 2011
1 post
I STILL EXIST, YOU GUYS
Don’t forget me
Don’t forget me
TAKE IT EASY ON ME JUST FOR A LITTLE WHILE
You know I think about you
Let me know you think about me too